Ok so heres the update! LOL Sorry..

Well we have had a busy couple of months..

OJ update:  She started preschool two days a week and she LOVES it, she asks me to go back all the time.  She has two little friends that she plays with and she adores her teachers.  I am the class mom so I so the collecting for trips and bake cookies for the class..its so Martha Stewart and so out of character for me, the *others* think its hysterical.  She has been growing a lot, shes 38lbs and 39 inches tall.  We have been working hard on the sleeping schedule and that has helped a lot, I have had 4 nights of uninterrupted sleep now which is a huge plus.  We are also completely PT'ed not even needing a diaper at our nap!  Hooray!!  Also, OJ is just the sweetest child, shes such a joy to me.

Steph update: I am doing good, my anxiety is still under control without medication so I am incredibly thankful for that.  My running came to a screeching halt with my treadmill going under so we are looking to get a new one soon but its fixed for now, that helped my anxiety more than anything.  So my big news I suppose is that I have decided that I am more of a two baby mama..so we are going to start trying in January YAY!!  I am hoping for a Christmas-y baby but not ON Christmas of course so I would even prefer the end of Nov.  I am really excited and super scared all at the same time.  The reality of having another baby scares me not the idea.  LOL..  I just think of how easy things have become with OJ because shes potty trained and wonder about taking another step back to go back to diapers but we will manage.  I want to give OJ a *real* sibling so shes got someone when I am gone, even if they aren't best friends they will have one another.  I can't leave her to be like I was when my dad died, I was the only one who had lost my dad.  The *others* wouldn't feel the same way so this has made my decision a little easier and shes been asking for a teeny baby with tiny baby toes so who am I to not give her that.  I think that the fact that she'll be 4ish when I have #2 will be good too, she will want to help and she'll have her own things going on so it won't be all about the baby.   My biggest concern is probably my anxiety and hoping that another pregnancy and birth won't be another trigger.  I didn't have what I would call PPD with OJ but then adding my dads death and big K being gone all the time I was just surviving and it all built up on me.

My relationship with my husband has come to this wonderful place and so I am also scared what a second baby will do to that.  What my plan is currently is that we write a contract to each other that we will not let things slip this time.  Hopefully that will be what we need to remind ourselves that we're important too.  I also have to let go and get a babysitter and let that person take care of OJ and *newbaby*.

My relationship with my mom has also come to a really nice spot, I must be letting more go and being less crazed about stupid shit, its really the only thing that I can think of because my two hardest relationships have become tremendously easier.  I also quit Judith, I told her that I would probably be back but I needed a break from it.  I have been fine for it and its saved me $175 every week.

I have picked my knitting back up given that its fall and I feel like its time to be doing that again!  I completed a cowl for myself and I have gotten about halfway through a sweater for OJ which is just turning out to be gorgeous.  I will post a picture once its finished.

So that's the update.  Its exciting to me but not really...lol.